Sorry Guys, the Ladies Make the Avengers Rock!

I saw The Avengers movie on opening weekend. My son Jeremy and I are HUGE fans of super hero movies and this one blew our socks off. Probably the best ever (at least the top three). Great plot, great dialogue and a stellar cast. I had my doubts about Mark Ruffalo as Bruce Banner, but he did an excellent job. However, the boys couldn’t hold a candle to the girls, even outnumbering them more than two to one.

I’m going to do this in order of screen time to avoid having to pick a best. That would just over tax my poor testosterone driven brain. Gwyneth Paltrow reprises her role as Pepper Potts, Tony Stark’s uber-hot right hand gal and (finally) love interest. Let me say that Daisy Duke has nothing on Pepper in the denim shorts department. Pepper wraps the genius playboy Stark around her libido with some of the best dialogue and a mouth that makes a guy wonder why the Ironman isn’t kissing her all the time. Paltrow owns this role. I really hope that as the franchise continues we see much more of this sexy, smart blonde aide de camp.

Not being a huge comic book reader, I was unfamiliar with the character of Maria Hill. Played by the gorgeous Cobie Smulders (I think her real name sounds more like a secret agent than her character’s name), Hill kicks some extreme butt in this movie. And the woman can wear spandex like…. oh, well, words escape me. I write a lot of  strong female characters and I love Maria Hill. She is capable, gets the job done and handles herself like a pro. Her up-in-a-bun hairstyle kept me wondering what she looked like when the hair came down. Sigh. Put some glasses on her and the librarian fantasy comes to life. Sexy and smart… I see a theme emerging here. Thinking man’s heroines.

Scarlet Johansson as Natasha Romanoff… was the cherry on the cupcake of this movie… but with the kick of an habanero chile. Cute short haircut that let her move… and oh, how this gal can move, and a skin tight uniform that was always flattering and often quite a tease. The only thing sexier than how her mouth looked was some of the lines that came out of it. (Sorry, didn’t write any down, you’ll have to watch it for yourself). Don’t think for a minute that tying Natasha to a chair will slow her down (no, I won’t go any further with that thought), she will still kick your ass up one side and down the other.  Johansson does some very good acting in this movie. There are some great, intense scenes with her and Jeremy Renner (Hawkeye). Yes, if I was young, good looking and single, I would stalk marry her.

Now here’s the real kicker; none of these gals has any super human powers, any suit of armor or special weapons. They are completely human and have to rely on their wits, training and (when dealing with some of the men) their senses of humor. Sure, it’s easy to be awesome when you turn into a green giant, wear a cool red and gold flying suit or have a science experiment running through your veins. Or you’re a demi-god. Nope, these three ladies had to earn the spotlight with nothing but their good looks… OK, that’s a pretty big advantage, but still… talent, skill, sexy lips, and some rockin’ derrieres.

Hated to see them go, but loved to watch them walk away. Maybe the next Avengers movie will be shot in 3-DD.  What? You expected something classy? Please…

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